The Creator's Process Called Life

For as young as I could remember I wanted to rule the world, apparently, it was a twisted desire for a very young person to have. Now all I want is to eat today, to not be a burden to those who I care about, to those who care about me.
Whether I am still young or now old depends on one’s perspective, if you’d ask me, I’d tell you I agree with some of Amber Run, I mean life is indeed a fickle game right?
What happened between the time when I wanted to rule the world and now? Just a few years and I couldn’t care less about ruling anything.

The summary is that life happened.
Life happened, and I changed in other to survive because apparently adaptability is the key to survival.

I changed to survive, I changed again and again and again.
To survive, the change had to be continuous and at one point when I checked myself, I was not who I use to be, I was not who I knew neither was I who I wanted to be. Who was this stranger in the mirror; physically different, mentally different, spiritually different and also different in the level of knowledge acquired.
Little drops of water really do make an ocean, but we are not talking about increase we are talking about absolute change, transformation if you may.
Now here is the tricky part; If I didn’t change I would not survive, thus eliminated from life. I changed and survive but I am not me, I have lost myself a while ago. One can’t help but ask what is the point if I am no longer me, what is me? who am I? what determines me? Does "me" matter?

Well I hope this comfort is enough

What you are doesn’t matter, what you were doesn’t matter, what you want to be doesn’t matter, what you need to be is what does matter, and life... life is the creator’s tool, the creator’s process in making us what we need to be. Want doesn’t beat need, it never did, and it never will.

Let’s admit it, how messed up will I have been now with that ideology I had when I was young, how messed up would the world have been if I had my way with my mindset, my obsession to own the world like it was something to have. Now all I want is my next meal, all I want is to not be a burden. It is not good enough I know, but the creator’s process called life is not done with me, it is still changing me.